At PackagingSupplies.com there are six different options when you search for stretch film rolls. Perhaps they aren’t all stretchy, and they might not all be on a roll, but they all fit the general qualification for being a film.

You know how you’ve been wanting to make that self-produced CD look at lot more legit? Because, let’s face it, an unwrapped CD just screams “lame”. After spending all that money on studio hours and hiring back-up trumpets, making a label, burning copies, and all of the above, why not just go that teensy eensy extra bit and wrap those babies up? This is what shrink film is good for, and that is one of your options at PackagingSupplies.com.

I won’t get into the ginormous rolls, because those are not what you are looking for in this situation, but consider instead the shrink bag kit. This handy collection comes with a a sealer, a heat gun, and five-hundred bags, six by eleven inches. You can go with an eight inch sealer, a twelve inch sealer, or a sixteen inch sealer. The bottom line is: you are going to need a sealer. This is what melts the send of the bag, locking that product inside. You will also need a heat gun.

Do not try to substitute with a hair dryer! I repeat, do not try to substitute with a hair dryer? Do you catch my drift? The heat gun is what will actually cause the plastic to shrink around the product. The kit only comes with one size of bag, but other sizes are available bought separately, from super cute to serious business (AKA four by six up to eighteen by twenty-four).

Consider food service stretch film rolls. This is an industrial way of saying “saran wrap”. These rolls come in four different lengths, between one foot and two feet, and each box holds two thousand feet. The box comes with the typical cutter bar, and this one actually works. If you are thinking something long-term you might want to consider the reusable dispenser, which is made from heavy duty plastic that is convenient to dispense from, because you don’t have to try to stabilize the container while simultaneously removing the film and trying to keep it from clinging to itself (that’s the worst). The reusable dispenser sits firmly while you finagle the wrap, and there are refill rolls to replenish with ease.

More types of stretch film rolls in part two…

As important as stretch film wrap is to the working world, I want to take a minute to talk about the stretch film wrap dispenser. If you are like me, you might like to try and save by cutting some corners. Sometimes I think that I can purchase a product without all of the suggested accessories and that I will “improvise”. I don’t suggest improvising with stretch film wrap.

Have you seen the stuff? It’s like the Hulk version of saran wrap, and by that I mean it’s indestructible. You could probably wrap yourself up in it and survive a nuclear blast… then again, you would probably suffocate, but that’s not the point. The point is that a roll of stretch film wrap can come a foot long, fifteen inches long, or a foot and a half long. I’m talking industrial strength. If you try to improvise with this stuff you will probably wind up looking like Frodo after Shelob got ahold of him and stashed him in her lair. And that was seriously disturbing.

If you don’t think it would be hazardous to your physical health, consider your mental state. Do you realize how frustrated and angry you get when regular, food-grade saran wrap folds over onto itself? Even though we always think we can wind up straightening it back out by hand, we always wind up cursing and wadding it into a ball that we throw across the room. Imagine this on a much more massive scale. On par with the Hulk. It makes me shudder to think about. This is why I’m advocating for the stretch film wrap dispenser.

At PackagingSupplies.com there are three different styles to choose from, and all of them are adjustable to fit all of the different styles of wrap. The roll of wrap slides right onto the dispenser; at one end is a handle, and then another handle comes around the front of it. It’s like a giant paper towel roll, really, with another handle running parallel to the bar in case you might want to mummify your cat or something. Since stretch film wrap is industrial grade it really does need to be handled well. It’s going to be heavy, and bulky, and hard to get in place if you are just doing it by hand. It’s like trying to change a baby’s diaper without putting them down: it’s doable, but the results won’t be pretty.

The first thing I think of when I hear “stretch film wrap” is Dexter. Dexter the show, about Dexter the guy who goes around killing people vigilante style. His murder lab is never in the same place twice, and it is absolutely fortified by plastic on plastic on plastic. The whole vicinity is draped in poly sheeting, like the heavy duty plastic that is an economical alternative to things like drop cloths. And then the victim is wrapped up on the table in giant stretch wrap. It’s awful. It’s gruesome. I had to stop watching the show. I probably shouldn’t even be talking about it right now because it’s not very professional. Although Dexter would definitely beg to differ. He was about as professional at it as humanly possible, or should I say as Hollywood as possible, which means that no one could ever accomplish what Dexter accomplished.

In case you didn’t want to associate stretch film wrap with murder, which I’m sure you don’t, feel free to associate it with the American dream. If you own a business, stretch film wrap is going to wind up coming in handy for you. It can come in different colors, for the more adventurous types, or just clear. PackagingSupplies.com carries the dispenser, which you will surely need if you plan on handling this stuff. Unless you get the actual food grade wrap, the rest of it is so large that some terrible accident is bound to happen if handled incorrectly, and people will think that there is a Dexter wanna-be out there. Sorry. I forgot I wasn’t supposed to talk about him.

Back to stretch film wrap.

If you think even the big stuff is for sissies, there is machine grade for your type. As you can guess, this is so huge that it needs a machine to operate it. (Wait for it… Wait for it… “That’s what she said!”. Man. What is wrong with me today? It must be the full moon). But as far as the machine grade stretch film wrap, this is absolutely what you want to wrap pallets with. Pallets with boxes stacked on them, that is. It would be pointless to just wrap up pallets. This way nothing shifts or falls in transit. As they always say, “If you want to protect it, wrap it up!”

Wait for it…